Looking Forward, Looking Back: Reflections on Listening to my Intuition
On Thursdays, I’ve started posting personal blogs, many of which are about finding flow and learning to listen to my intuition.
If you don’t want to read about this, that’s a-okay!
There will be lots more pretty pictures for you next Tuesday.
Here’s something I’ve learned about intuition and ego from Jess Lively in super concise terms: Intuition is growth-seeking and Ego is risk-averse. Unfortunately for me (and you, and all of us), that means they are in constant opposition.
I’ve noticed, when I reflect back on life and business, my intuition gives me a big old high five. It says, “Hell yes, you grew! Keep moving forward, you badass!” And my ego is relatively settled in that moment because it recognizes that I haven’t managed to fully self-destruct yet. (“Phew!”)
But then I look forward at all the things I want and all the growth I want for my business. And my ego has a little panic attack. It kicks into full blown fear mode, telling me “You can’t. It’s too much. It’s too risky. You can’t do it. Why even try?”
It pleads, with all it’s kicking and screaming might, to protect me from disappointment and embarrassment and failure.
Meanwhile, I know my intuition is flowing serenely beneath the surface, saying “You’re fine. Stop worrying so much. Let’s just see where this goes…” But I can’t hear it under all the ego-yelling, so I grab some Wheat Thins and turn on the latest episode of The Bachelor and drown it all out.
I don’t have the perfect answer to this.
My best guess, in those moments, is to thank my overprotective-yet-misguided ego for trying to have my back, and respectfully decline to let it make decisions for me.
I’m suspect this applies to all those wedding decisions you’ve been making lately. Maybe looking into the months leading up to your wedding puts you into ego-overdrive panic-mode. You don’t know how you’re going to get it all done and you’re wondering why you didn’t just elope anyway!
But your intuition knows that it will come together if you take it one step at a time. Your intuition knows that an inexact shade of cerulean napkin won’t make or break the event. You know in your gut that this is about love and a marriage, not a party (even though it will be an awesome party). So tell your ego to just give it a rest already.
I hope that this makes sense to you and that today you’re finding some inner peace.
But if you’re not, remember, it helps to flip your perspective. Instead of looking ahead into uncertainty and fear, take a moment to look back at all of the amazing things you have already done.
From there, just take it one day at a time.
